September - 2007
Greene County School System

Teach—and earn—respect from your middle schooler

What’s one of the most critical values you can instill in your middle schooler? Respect. By teaching her to respect you, herself and others, you’ll help her grow into a grounded, decent adult.

And, believe it or not, she’s looking to you for guidance. Studies show that kids do care what their parents think. Don’t assume your preteen takes her cues from friends and pop culture. The signals you send your preteen about the issue of respect are critical.

To make sure your message gets through loud and clear:

Remember that you’re not her friend. Your preteen already has friends; she needs you to be her parent. Friends have equal power in a relationship; parents and children do not. It may sound like fun to be her buddy, but she needs you to be an authority figure. Earn your child’s respect by being reliable and steady, not by being her pal.
Be tough when necessary. A survey reports that 55 percent of parents cave in to their child’s nagging. Don’t be one of them. Instead, be firm and reasonable when dealing with your preteen. Treat her fairly and you’ll demonstrate respect. Be consistent and loving and you’ll earn it.

Reprinted with permission from the September 2007 issue of Parents Still make the difference!® (Middle School Edition) newsletter. Copyright © 2007 The Parent Institute®, a division of NIS, Inc. Source: Jim Taylor, Ph.D., Your Children Are Under Attack: How Popular Culture is Destroying Your Kids’ Values, and How You Can Protect Them, ISBN: 1-4022-0346-2 (Sourcebooks, Inc., 630-961-3900, www.sourcebooks.com).

Spending Time Together

Your little moments together can mean a great deal to your child

When your preteen was younger, spending time with her probably came naturally. Now that she’s becoming a young adult, it can be tough to just “hang out” together.
But spending time together is important for both of you, so don’t give up on it. Even if it’s a stolen moment here or there, the time you spend with your preteen means a lot. Here are several places you may find those moments:

In the car. If you’re like most people, you spend plenty of time behind the wheel. So take your preteen with you when you run errands. Sitting side by side (instead of face to face) may encourage your preteen to open up and talk more—about school, sports, friends or just life in general.
In the kitchen. Cooking is another wonderful opportunity for spending time together. Ask your preteen to chop lettuce while you boil pasta. Have her describe her “dream meal” while you work.
At the book store. Her taste in books may differ from yours, but spend an afternoon indulging her anyway. Browse whichever shelves she chooses. By taking an interest in the things she likes, you demonstrate that you value her.

Reprinted with permission from the September 2007 issue of Parents Still make the difference!® (Middle School Edition) newsletter. Copyright © 2007 The Parent Institute®, a division of NIS, Inc. Source: Gwen Morrison, “Time Together: Spending Quality Time with Your Teen,” Teenagers Today, www.teenagerstoday.com/resources/articles/qualitytime.htm.

Attendance Matters

Attendance must be a top priority for your child

Strong attendance is as important to your child’s school career as the foundation is to a house. Without it, there is nothing to build on.

It would be nearly impossible to list all the reasons your child must be in school. Here are just a few:

School attendance is the law. Every school district requires students to attend. The only exceptions are illness or family emergency.
Missing school is terrible for classroom performance. Most children have trouble keeping up if they miss more than a few days.
Peer relations often get started at school. A child who misses school may have fewer friends.

To aim for top attendance:

Tell your child that school is important to you and the family. You expect her to be in school.
Don’t take your child out of school to baby-sit other children.
Don’t take your child out of school to do errands.
Schedule appointments for non-school hours whenever possible.

Reprinted with permission from the September 2007 issue of Parents Still make the difference!® (Middle School Edition) newsletter. Copyright © 2007 The Parent Institute®, a division of NIS, Inc. Source: “Is your child missing out? School Attendance: Information for Parents,” Department for Education and Skills, United Kingdom, Dfes Publications, www.dfes.gov.uk/schoolattendance/uploads/PARENTS%20LEAFLET%20FINAL%2012-12-2005.pdf.

Ready to Learn

Being organized helps assure a smooth middle school experience

Any student—even an academic star—will have trouble in middle school if he is not organized. Not having the homework or the tools to do it, not knowing where anything is or when it is due, are serious setbacks. Being organized is crucial to being ready to learn.

Here are some things to try:

Have permanent homes for the things he needs and stick to a flexible schedule.
Buy a binder with dividers. These are available at discount stores for a few dollars. Your child should assign a section to each subject and keep papers from the subject in the correct section. Once a week, have him go through the binder and weed out old papers.
Get your child a backpack or sturdy school bag. Have him pack it each night with the things he needs for the next day. It should wait by the door for him every morning.
Keep a daily checklist taped to the front of his binder. For example, “Social Studies: Do I have my book? Homework?” There should be a listing like this for each subject.
Encourage your child to do a “locker dump” every Friday. Lockers that are not regularly cleaned out soon become difficult to close!

Reprinted with permission from the September 2007 issue of Parents Still make the difference!® (Middle School Edition) newsletter. Copyright © 2007 The Parent Institute®, a division of NIS, Inc. Source: Donna Goldberg, The Organized Student: Teaching Children the Skills for Success in School and Beyond, ISBN: 0-7432-7020-7 (Simon & Schuster, 1-800-456-6798, www.simonsays.com).